Post 18: The inner beast?!

Dear Diary,



So Anyhow I get up and me and Collin decide to go crazy loco, we start running around Shaynee Xi from the shadows, being all well, mental. She goes inside and we decide to crip on the Pit roof. We dance, we have a laugh its good just to let go.


We grab a crate of beanie babies… pink elephant beanies to be exact, so we take the create to the bottom of the pit stairs, Shay appears at the top and we hide it, Who knows what we were going to do with those beanies, but were caught red handed Collin vanishes, and leaves me too it.

I create Shay a flower, she seems appreciative of it, Mikayla doesn’t and storms off in a huff, Me and Shay exchange pleasantries till Vitalia appears behind me, the fallen angel who poisoned me to teach me a lesson when I was a feline… A LESSON, oh my god, it gets me mad just thinking about it. It makes me laugh it does, really that they hold all other life in disregard apart from the houses?! What the fuck…. Fuck it any how… Im invited into the pit… Well this is a new one on me, shay invites me in and Mikayla is dangling from some device in the ceiling, she sees me and gets all huffy again and walks off; don’t know what I have done to her but meh im sure shell get over it.


So im in the PIT! It smells, and its hot, not the ideal place, shadows start to surround me, Brianna is the first to join the circle, diary she truly scares the shit out of me, quite literally she is insane to the point that im sure if she put her mind to it she could warp the very fabric of reality around her, quick note not to fuck with her just yet. The Kashgari bops in, Drake, it’s a who’s who of shadows, Shay talks to me about my inner beast they all keep going on about it, they want me to let go, they want me to Go wild, 2 shadows have seen my rage, Blueray and Lumi

--There is a whole paragraph scribbled out, the words not legible at all—

Shay keeps trying to touch me, I fucking hate that, why do they feel the need to touch me, I don’t care for they’re touch I hate the connection I hate the feeling, but obviously she has some sort of deficiency and keeps try, I finally let her and she touches my cheek, she drones on about the shadows finally taking over the city, yeah more fun for me to be honest, bring it on. Shay gives me one week to make a decision I have no idea what that decision is, to release my ‘inner beast’ to join them? Do they not realise that I won’t, that I really am not interested in they house, it doesn’t tempt me in the slightest, but they won’t listen, so here’s a brick wall, keep bashing your head against it.


I DJ later that day and Calleigh and Tikamu the prowler drops by, Tikas a Solid person, some one has taken her eye, I ask if I can be of assistance she declines my offer, then I hand Calleigh a note.

Elemental, monster you are not…..i understand….

She goes very mad I don’t know why, I see now how her life was when she was back a human... Tora arrives and the situation bubbles down … when I finish my set I goto bed……….. Sleep…. Even my sleep is invaded by darkness… regret… and…. Cheese on toast… MMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

post 15: Elemental, monster

Dear diary


Sunday was a slow day; the only thing of real note was that I had a vision come to me while training with Tora. It was a vision of a red headed girl, being experimented on I recognise her as Calleigh, they really did a number on her. I remember the tag they use for her …. Elemental, monster……Monster… the people on the mainland use that word a lot to describe those which are different. It’s what the nurse used to call me at cramps. Anyhow as I said Sunday was slow. Catch you later.

Post 3: Full Moon

**The Handwriting on this page is very forced, as if it has taken great effort to write.**


Dear diary,


Too day was the full moon and i have had no end of fun.... NOT.   Lets take it from the top shall we, i was walking the streets of Tox and went to the alleyway between haven and the TV shop, walking through guess who i spy, Lumi, i dont know why i stopped, she's a shadow and a person who i REALLY hate but something compelled me to do so, anyway we talked.  She raved about seeing the true me the night i killed her, about how im no better then the rest, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster, im not a monster.  Is that enough ? Want some more ? I dont have to justify what i did and wont, not to anyone including you diary, suffice to say me and her have issue and somewhere down the line shes going down... she had the nerve to say i should join her... yeah in a pigs eye.


So i saw niv today, funny the thing me and her have, theres a tension there who knows what it is, but she doesnt half go on.  I decided to have some fun so i took her to one of the rooms in the shelter we had a moment.  I got a bottle of ordinary water and poured it onto my hand.  Its the first time ive seen somethign other then cockyness in her eyes, i dont know what happened with her and holy water but it looked to scare her i felt bad she disappeared off and i was left to my own devices.


I got the wolfsbane vial from Bohny Just before i started my set in the Ktox HQ, Tora was there, Blueray and my boy Dent, poor guy, hes having some problems with his family hope everything gets straightened out hes a good guy.  So i DJ and at the end Calleigh Constantine comes in to take over by this time the moon sings to me, i cant concentrate, i worry about if the bane is going to work or not all of a sudden i start to change, Tora injects me while Calleigh restrains me with magic, thank god it worked. Calleigh constantine, people tell me not to trust her, they say she stab you in the back, but from what i have seen she is very trust worthy, she gave me the wolfsbane, she helped with with being restrainied during my change.  Who knows i dont know her enough to Judge.


BLUEEEEEERAYYYYY, that woman, i asked her to meet me after i DJed, i wanted to see if she was ok after the magnet incident.  I like blue, not in a 'i want to hump you all night long way' but in a 'ah your cool' kinda way, shes not like the others, she discusses her shit and knows when to and not to involve the family, the feeling isnt mutaul i reckon, Shed probably tear my spine out if given the opportunity.. meh.


So anyhow, i co-ordinate a kick ass defence plan, for the full moon, youd think my family could execute it, but no instead they brawl in the streets and nel is greivously wounded... whatever. Anyhow so the wolves attack, and Kahlen Tears off my arm, Diary...i saw them, as i lay there, broken, in the street bleeding the voices of my friends became quieter and quieter, and theyre voices my baby and darling wifes became louder and louder, my regen had been affected by the bane, my aggrivated wound wouldnt seal wouldnt stop, i was tossed around like a rag doll i remember dumped on a hospital bed, as my friends and family raced to save me, question is diary, did i want to be saved, profound statement right there... Did. i. want. to. be. Saved.  did i want to come back to a world town that is so dark and so fucking twisted that it eats at my very soul just breating this god damn fucking toxic air. have a guess. So i lived, i wokeup to pestilence, Tora, nat, aeries, collin all around me. but there was only 2 people i wanted to see.


i hate the full moon.